I had a test and a practical today. Super thankful that they went alright, considering I played all weekend, which I have somewhat documented!
Met up with my very good friend M for lunch on Saturday.. I haven't seen her in a long time so it was a happy reunion. :) Also, it was straight up snowing that day! In October! I tried to take a pic of us in it, but it's not really visible here. Oh well.
Later, I met up with some buddies and we tried to celebrate Halloween. I was supposed to be a doll of some sort?
And yeah.. let me keep it real and say that recent pics have reminded me that I need to go get my teeth bleached! haha. Too much coffee en mi diet. Yay for dental school discounts.
Today I spent 8 hours in lab. 4 hours in Operative, cutting preparations on teeth, and 4 in Dental Anatomy for a competency where I had to carve a tooth out of a block of wax.
By the end of the day, I was TIRED. My hand was cramped from carving, and sitting for such a long time is surprisingly exhausting. But, a funny realization occurred: I enjoy this. I think it's especially telling that I like the work, despite the fact that I still feel mediocre at what I do.
To be honest, at this point, even if I hated dental school, I wouldn't quit. I'm too far into this, I worked too hard to get here. Some people, ie of the "life's too short to not be happy" school of thought, may disagree with this hypothetical decision, but it's such a relief to know that so far, I think I'm in the right place.
"I know what you’re thinking: I’m a pushover. I’m weak and scared and would put up with anything to keep the family together. I’m probably one of those women who would endure physical abuse. But I can assure you, I’m not. I load 1,500-pound horses into trailers and gallop through the high country of Montana all summer. I went through Pitocin-induced natural childbirth. And a Caesarean section without follow-up drugs. I am handy with a chain saw."
-from a NYT article about how one woman dealt with her marriage in crisis. Random reading material.
Isn't her logic flawed though? Just because one is physically strong does not necessarily mean she is emotionally strong.
I tend to wear strong and/or neutral colors. Especially since it's fall, which kind of demands it. Pastels, like the Easter egg variety (light blues, purples, pinks, etc.), kind of scare me. I was thinking about color combinations, and it occurred to me that I really like the idea of maroon and olive green together.
You're feeling me, right? Right?! I think people get scared off because it's embedded in our minds that red and green together equal "Christmas colors", but the key is how they are approached.
First, shade. Even I would agree that bright hues of either will scream "I'm Santa's little helper! Let me roll up in here on this reindeer!", but when toned down, they're not bad. Secondly, how they are worn. Good color blocking with separates. I have an Army green anorak that I adore. I wear it with everything! I can see a maroon knit scarf pairing nicely with it, or a thinly-striped thermal.
So yeah. If this takes off as a trend, you heard it here first. :) If not, then Christmas is just 2 months away!
As a little Asian girl, being left-handed was always a point of surprise to many people; namely, Korean adults that thought it was weird or flat-out wrong. Even my mom briefly thought about training me to have the standard right-handedness.
Growing up, the issue became inconsequential. I adjusted to our right-handed world, it became more acceptable to be left-handed, and it was just no big deal.
However, I just HAD to choose a profession where handedness matters, to a certain degree. Out of 96 people in my class, only 4 of us are southpaws. Today, we were working on one of the lower right teeth, which is relatively comfortable for most of my classmates. I was struggling. Not playing the blame game because I def have a lot to practice and learn regardless, but I realized that part of the reason was because I had trouble positioning my dominant hand in the mouth. It wasn't until I talked to another left-handed classmate, who had some difficulty as well, that this clicked. Had we been assigned a lower left tooth (and we probably will be at some point), it would have been easier.
Anyway. I like being left-handed. Adds to what makes me special! :P
Saw Wicked last night. It was a spur of the moment decision to go-I got a text earlier in the day from a friend who happened to have an extra ticket, and I jumped at the chance to see it. As with everything else that is wildly popular, I was skeptical that this would live up to its hype, but hoped that it would. I am happy to report that it was every bit as AMAZING as it should have been.
Upon coming home from the show, I immediately listened to several of the tracks (thanks Youtube). However, I'm seeing that like Shakespeare, whose works are often read solely for literary value, songs from musicals are meant for performance. The magic that left me in awe in the theater isn't quite replicated in the recordings. I liked "Defying Gravity" before seeing Wicked, but it's like living in a 2-D world and all of a sudden discovering a 3rd dimension. I see that I was missing out!
Lastly, this play resonated with me because, and maybe it's a complex that I just need to get over, I, too have often felt like the misfit. Little Miss Misunderstood, in so many ways. And I think this musical is for those whose truths have gone beyond what meets the eye.
We started the lab part of Operative today. Basically making restorative/amalgam preps (drilling) on fake teeth. This is what lab looks like, and what I did all day.. sitting at my work station with my mannequin. Since I'm a lefty, I'm on the end of the row and work in the opposite direction as most of my classmates. I like this class because the simulations are getting more real. We're getting closer to treating patients! I mean, at this point I don't think anyone should let me near an actual person's mouth waving a high speed handpiece around, but still. Closer. :)
Obsessed with this song for right now. Iron and Wine-Fever Dream.
I'm always in the middle of a book. Or several. I just finished Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat Pray Love, and just started Cormac McCarthy's The Road. Very different books.. I think The Road may be kind of scary. Or not scary, but eerie. Haunting. That's what I got from the first few pages. And the cover. I know what they say about judging books by their covers, but look at it! I just really don't think there will be rainbows and butterflies popping out anytime soon..
I don't think I've even once rolled up to school on time this year. And it's October. School started in August. Bad, bad, bad. I've sheepishly ducked into classrooms so many times it feels like a habit.
However, I'm trying to make some changes around here.
1. Make my lunch ahead of time. It doesn't matter that it only takes 5 minutes to slap together a sandwich, in the mornings 5 minutes is valuable. In the same vein, preparing my materials I need the next day the night before.
2. Wake up at least 30 minutes before I have to leave. Lately, I've been letting myself sleep until 15 minutes before I have to go! I think I have the mentality that because I don't have to think about what I'm going to wear (since I wear the same scrubs everyday), I can just get up, get dressed and go. But then I remember, oh yeah, I should make lunch. Oh yeah, I need to brush my teeth. Oh yeah, I have to eat something. And do I have time to make some coffee? Pretty soon I'm hustlin like I'm running a marathon out the door.
Anyway. Hope this works out.. this being late thing is getting old.
Went to a shindig tonight for the new D.5s (I am currently a D1. Last year I was a D.5). Not too many of them showed up due to miscommunication. Not anyone's fault, but it ended up mostly being just my class hanging out. Weird how I was sitting in the D.5s place just last year, not sure how the year would turn out. And now here I am! Thank God.
Also, I got a filling done today. I had the hardest time getting numb.
I had a 4 hour carving session today. I knocked my wax tooth out in 3, but that's still a few hours of uninterrupted work. So I decided to check out a new album, Wolf Gang's Suego Faults.
I have a hard time liking artists in their entirety. It's usually a song here, a song there that I enjoy in an album, and could live without the rest of it.
This album is no exception, but there are a handful of notable tracks that include:
-Lions in Cages
-Stay and Defend
-Suego Faults
-The King and All of His Men
-Midnight Dancers
But it's a solid album overall.. even the songs I found myself skipping over weren't ear-bleeding awful. I would elaborate but I'm currently studying for a test tomorrow. Seriously, tests put the damper in life.
So. I've traded in Gross Anatomy and DentSim for two new ones, Dental Anatomy and Periodontics. I must say, the change is for the better so far.
Dental Anatomy consists of lecture, and then carving teeth out of wax. Today was my first time in working in the lab. It's pretty relaxing, once you get into the zone. My ipod battery died earlier in the day (RIP Steve Jobs btw.. his ipod has made many a run/walk/travel that much more enjoyable for me), but I'm definitely charging it tonight to listen to while working tomorrow.
And Perio! A Godsend. The dr/professor is very type A. The class is extremely organized and structured, down to a seating chart. I thrive on this type of instruction. I hate when things are unclear and loosey goosey. I know what exactly expected of me by the teacher, and vice versa. Some people might dislike the rigidity, but it's like I can almost relax because I know there won't be any curveballs thrown at me, or missing pieces that I might forget. Unlike some other classes I'm studying for right now.. a couple of them have been a lecture here, a lecture there with no consistency in time/place, and then like 2989483 documents that we're supposed to sift through and memorize.
Tentative opinions.. I may change my mind as the semester goes on..
Today we had a huge lecture on all the different kinds of specialties there are in dentistry. For each specialization, a representative doctor gave a little presentation. Ortho was conspicuously absent from the group. Which was fine by me, since I currently don't see myself pursuing that route.
As of right now, I'm not too keen on specializing (the general dentist sold me on the fact that general dentistry encompasses all specialties), but it is an option that I want to keep open in case I change my mind. Of the ones presented, I am still most interested in endodontics. Maybe because I worked in the dept last year, but it still seems like it would fit my personality the best. However, my roommate thinks I'll be singing a different tune once I actually start practicing/performing root canals next year. We'll see..
Home is a safe haven for me. I equate coming back to my apartment as a time of rest and relaxation. My room is my quiet sanctuary for me to unwind. Except in the corner, where my desk sits, untouched.
It's actually becoming a problem, not being able to study at home. At the same time, there's nowhere that I can go this late at night to hit the books. I either need to find a way to force myself into thinking that this is a place of hard work/discipline and NOT fluffy pillows/warm tea/soothing music, or venture out into the quickly chilling nights to find a place to get work done.
UVA Law Library, how I miss you! With your wide tables, ample outlets, late hours. And complimentary tea. I can't forget that.
There are a bunch of potential topics I could cover in this entry since it's been a couple of days since I've written. Since I cannot choose, I'm making a list! Because I love lists. :)
1. I went to a concert a couple of nights ago and I ended up really liking the opening act, Scars on 45. I have to say, there is no comparison to recorded vs. live music, when the artist is good. Love love love live music.
2. Spontaneously made a trip up to Charlottesville this weekend, and I think it was good for me. I've been feeling like a fish out of water lately, and it was so refreshing to genuinely laugh and smile and be my weird little self around friends. The weather was amazing too, which only added to my happiness.
3. Today, I went for a run and this guy/girl stopped me. They asked me whether I believed that there was a mother God, as well as a father God and tried to tell me that there is evidence of this in the Bible. WTF? First off, no, there is one God. Secondly, there is freedom and salvation in Christ. He is the only way, and maybe if these people were Christians, they would focus on that while evangelizing instead of a moot point. I engaged in the conversation for a bit, but I knew that no matter what I said, they weren't going to change their minds as much as I wasn't going to change mine, so I continued on my run. I think this is a movement in my area, because this is not the first time that I've been approached about this.
4. My knees hurt from my run. :( It's like my knee caps popped out of their sockets. Hope that they'll feel better soon.
5. Another week of school.. yeah. Let's do this.
